Saturday, September 7, 2024, started like any other day. There was no sign that, by nightfall, our world would be turned upside down. That evening, my family lost an incredible man, a true pillar of our lives—my Uncle David J. Christoff—after a tragic accident.
In the days that followed, the shock was overwhelming. We were mourning not just the death of a loving husband, an outstanding father, one of the best Papa’s you could ever know, a loyal brother, the funniest uncle, and a faithful friend, but a man whose presence filled every room with warmth. But even in the midst of this grief, my family did what we’ve always done—we came together. We gathered in support and love, reminding each other of the strength we share.
As a priest, I’ve always understood that part of my ministry would be to care for and minister to my own family when needed. But I never imagined that the second funeral of my priesthood would be for my own uncle—a man who had supported and loved me at every step of my journey to becoming a priest.
It was my honor to preside over Uncle Dave’s funeral Mass on Saturday, September 14, 2024. As difficult as it was, it brought me great comfort to be able to remember and honor a man who loved his faith so deeply and who shared that faith with everyone around him. His legacy will live on in the countless lives he touched with his kindness, humor, and unwavering belief in God.
"Uncle Dave, 'May the angels lead you into paradise; may the martyrs receive you at your arrival and lead you to the holy city, Jerusalem. May choirs of angels receive you, and with Lazarus, once a poor man, may you have eternal rest.'" We will miss you always, Uncle David. May you rest in peace until we meet again.
David J. Christoff Funeral Homily - Saturday September 14, 2024
Holy Trinity Roman Catholic Church, Struthers Ohio
In 2002 the American country music singer and song writer Alan Jackson released a song titled “Where Were You.” The opening lyrics of Jackson’s song ask a question that just about everyone in American who is old enough to remember the tragic events of September 11th, 2001 could answer. He sings “Where were you when the world stopped turning, on that September day?” Jackson’s song continues by giving several examples of where people might have been when our country faced the attack on the Twin Towers. While it is a somber song, Jackson gives listeners great hope that the love we have for one another is greater than any tragedy and his song encourages us to rebuild on a foundation of love.
For all of us gathered here this morning, our worlds stopped turning last Saturday when we received the tragic and shocking news that David Christoff had died. A life changing event for all of us including Uncle Dave who’s earthly life here with us came to an end but who’s heavenly and eternal life in Christ has just begun. And like Alan Jackson’s song reminds us, we will most likely always remember where we were and what we were doing when we got that call. And while it’s okay to remember those moments when we received life changing news, we cannot dwell on the details, we cannot be overcome by the sadness, and we surly cannot try and figure out what we could have done differently to change the event. What we truly must do is remember to love - love like Uncle Dave loved - and move forward building upon that firm foundation of love. When we love we have the ability to change the narrative of the story. We have the power to turn the shock, confusion, heartbreak, and pain into something that is more powerful than sadness, we have the power to find and spread joy! Isn’t that exactly what happened to the women at the empty tomb on that first Easter morning? The women went from being shocked and wondering what had happened to the body of Jesus to joyfully running to tell the others of the Good News of the resurrection and new life.
Think about it! Today’s Gospel, from Luke brings us to the most important moment in human history—the Resurrection of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is the foundation of our faith, the core of the Good News that we proclaim: Jesus is alive! In this passage, we encounter the empty tomb and the bewilderment of the women who went to anoint the body of Jesus. But this bewilderment soon turns into the greatest joy, as they realize that death no longer has the final word. And while this gospel is not one of the commonly used or even recommend readings for a funeral liturgy, I couldn’t help but choose it to celebrate the life of Uncle Dave.
Why?
Because everyday of David Christoff’s life was an Easter morning. You see, Uncle David is one of the only people I knew that never seemed to doubt the power of the resurrection. He lived his life - teaching his children, grandchildren, family, and friends - that heaven is a real and wonderful place that has been unlocked for all of us thanks to the sacrifice of Christ. And that is exactly what Luke is telling us in his gospel today. For all the followers of Jesus, Good Friday was a day when their world stopped turning but Easter Sunday was the day that they saw and understand how powerful love truly is and how when we love like Jesus (love like Uncle D) we have the power to change the world.
Uncle Dave believed wholeheartedly that death truly had no power over us who believed in the resurrection and who were not afraid to proclaim, Jesus is alive! This idea along with his unwavering faith was one of the reasons that Uncle Dave saw calling hours and funerals as “cliché” at best. Zachary shared with me this week that his father was the worst person to go to a funeral with because of all the comments and speculation. It seemed very fitting to me that this Easter morning gospel was the right choice because like the two men in dazzling white at the empty tomb, Uncle Dave was often asking people the same question: “Why do you look among the dead for one who is alive? He is not here. He has been raised!”
When you think about it, these three short and simple sentences changed the entire tone and mood of the first Easter morning. Can I be so bold as to recommend that we allow these same three lines to change our mood as we face the death of a beloved husband, father, grandfather, brother, uncle, and friend? The question we have to face now is not “where were you when the world stopped turning?” No. The question we have to face now is:
“Where were you when you started to believe like David did?”
“Where were you when you started to ask questions such as ‘why do you look for the living among the dead’ like David did?”
“Where were you when you started to love like David did?”
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